Does Autistic Trauma Make It Hard for You to Trust Yourself, Too?

[2026] Neurodivergent Narratives - Writing Prompt #23: Our first June prompt from Genya Vasilov is perfectly aligned with this month's Autistic Culture Podcast Launch on June 22!

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There are twelve days until the launch of the Autistic Culture Podcast Network.

I know this because I have checked the calendar four times this morning.

The graphics are done. The trailer is finished. The landing page works. The press release is written. There are nine new shows, with more to come later this summer and in the autumn. People keep emailing me with practical questions, the kind you only ask when a dream is really looking likely to happen.

What time should I post?

Can I use this headshot?

Do you have the final logo files?

I am trying to answer every email and stay positive. If we keep going, I know we will get there.

But for now I am in this in-between land. There is a part of me that thinks this could be a huge success and another part of me that’s terrified the whole thing is about to fall apart.

It’s so hard to keep going at a time like this. To stay hopeful after burnout and failures have taken dreams away in the past. Maybe it’s easier not to dream at all.

When you are late-diagnosed Autistic, you spend a long time learning that your certainty and everyone else’s certainty are not the same thing. You walk into a room thinking you understand the assignment and then discover you were reading from a different script entirely.

Eventually you stop trusting yourself. Or maybe I should just speak for myself. I know after thinking I was doing everything right, being so thoughtful and careful, planning so hard for so long, and then failing, or being rejected or ignored. I have stopped trusting myself.

Part of me wants to quit. But part of me is a World Builder, a Data Gatherer, and a Rhythmic Communicator. I can’t wait around for the validation of someone more famous than me to tell us what I am building is important. I can see it. I know my business partner Simon can see it. The creators on our network can see it. And I hope with time you will be able to see the vision too.

The 2026 network schedule is robust. Twenty-five podcasts will be live on the network over the course of the year. Podcasts about Film. Football. Menopause. Parenting. Black autistic identity. Books. Religion. Anger. Friendship. Things I care about and things I never would have thought to make.

I was halfway through writing a resignation letter in my head when another message from a creator showed up.

He’s been flirting with burnout and I keep worrying he might quit, but there he was, handsome as ever, smiling picture standing in front of a book shelf with my first book about Autistic Culture on it.

“Hey Angela! Miss connecting with you - things have been so nuts but I wanted to share this with you - one of the first things I’ve done with my space (after painting) was to get some of my go-to books on my shelf. 💚”

He wasn’t asking whether we were really doing this.

He was excited because he had prepped a space that will be perfect for recording one of our upcoming shows for the Autistic Culture Podcast Network.

I must have read that message ten times.

Then another one came in.

Another creator copied me on a message to another podcast host asking whether we could organize crossovers between shows after the launch.

Not if.

After.

Yet another creator put me on her email list, and she sent a notification. “I'm excited to announce that on 22 June 2026 the Autistic Culture Podcast Network will launch my show.” and then messaged me privately to say:

”I’m getting good feedback since sending my Podcast Launch email!”

This. Is. Happening.

I looked back at the schedule on my ACPN Launch Checklist Google doc and checked another box.

For months, Simon and I have been carrying this project the way you carry a secret. Carefully. Quietly. Slogging through each of the unknown steps to starting a podcast network.

And then I realized something.

We are doing it already. So many people are walking toward it with us.

We are not dragging people toward a dream.

Twelve days before the launch, my little victory is this:

We aren’t doing it alone.

You’re here, right?

The world still might not understand what we are building.

The launch could still go wrong.

Technology will probably misbehave.

Somebody will almost certainly meltdown.

I probably will.

But for the first time in my life, I have stopped asking whether I am allowed to imagine a different future.

I am just staying focused on living into it.

Would you please join us at 4pm London Time (11am ET) on the 22nd of June to celebrate our victory?

In our first Neurodivergent Narratives writing prompt for June, editor Genya invites us to use writing to go deeper into reflection. The writing prompt is below. Paid members will see it. If you don’t see it, either you are not a paid member, or you are logged in to the wrong account. If you are not a member, you will need to subscribe to have full access and to see the prompt below. If you would like a free subscription for June, just reply to this email, and we will get you a free trial month.