How KW Unlearned a Lifetime of Wrong Labels After Identifying as AuDHD
In this meeting of The Late Diagnosis Club, Dr Angela Kingdon welcomes KW Raney, who shares how identifying as AuDHD in adulthood helped him reframe a lifetime of wrong labels.
In this meeting of The Late Diagnosis Club, Dr Angela Kingdon welcomes KW Raney, a therapist, creative, and podcast host who identified as AuDHD in adulthood after years of misdiagnosis, burnout, and self-blame.
As a child, KW was labelled with oppositional defiant disorder and grew up believing he was difficult, lazy, and broken. But decades later, recognition of ADHD, and later Autism, helped him reframe the struggles that had followed him since childhood.
Together, Angela and KW explore the cost of wrong labels, Autistic burnout, meltdowns mistaken for behavioural problems, sensory overwhelm, masking through work and education, and the long process of learning how to accommodate yourself instead of fighting yourself.
🎧 Listen to this episode:
🪑 Attendees
Chair: Dr Angela Kingdon — Author, community-builder, and Autistic advocate
Guest: KW Raney — Therapist, creative, and AuDHD advocate
You: The Listener!
🗒️ Meeting Agenda
Opening remarks from the Chair
Member introduction: Misdiagnosis, masking, ADHD discovery and later Autism recognition
Discussion: ODD labels and childhood misunderstanding
Burnout, depression, and reframing the past
Meltdowns, sensory overwhelm, and self-accommodation
Music, animals, and nervous system regulation
Trusting your own internal compass
Key learnings
Club announcements
🧾 Minutes from the Meeting
1️⃣ Opening Remarks
Angela introduces KW Raney, who reflects on how years of wrong labels shaped his identity, and how discovering he was AuDHD helped everything begin to make sense.
2️⃣ Member Introduction: KW’s Story
KW was diagnosed with oppositional defiant disorder as a child, a label that framed his distress and overwhelm as bad behaviour rather than unmet needs.
Despite academic success, he carried deep feelings of failure and self-blame into adulthood. It was only later, through recognising ADHD and then Autism, that he began to understand the lifelong patterns beneath those experiences.
3️⃣ Discussion Highlights
ODD label: Childhood distress framed as defiance instead of neurodivergence
Hidden struggle: Good grades masking internal overwhelm
Adult ADHD recognition: A workplace conversation changed the lens
Autism realisation: Later patterns are becoming clear through a new framework
Burnout reframe: Depression and suicidality viewed differently in hindsight
Meltdowns misunderstood: Pressure-valve overload mistaken for behaviour problems
Self-accommodation: Learning to support needs instead of suppressing them
Animal regulation: Comfort, pressure input, and nervous system calm
Music as lifeline: Emotional release, identity, and connection
Creative return: Rebuilding expression after burnout
Inner compass: Learning to trust yourself over old labels
4️⃣ Key Learnings
Wrong labels can shape identity for decades.
Achievement does not cancel out struggle.
Burnout is often misunderstood when neurodivergence is unseen.
Meltdowns are overwhelm, not moral failure.
Self-accommodation can be life-changing.
Healing often begins when you trust your own experience.
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🎙️ Executive Producers
Amy Burns, Anamaria B Call, Andrew Banner, Anna Goodson, Ashley Apelzin, Audrea Volker, Ben Coulson, Brian Churcek, Cappy Hamper, Carley Biblin, Charlene Deva, Chloe Cross, Clay Duhigg, Clayton Oliver, Danny Dunn, Daria Brown, David Garrido, Emily Burgess, Eric Crane, Erik Stenerud, Fiona Baker, Grace Norman, Helen Shaddock, Jaimie Collins, Jason Killian, Jen Unruh, Jennifer Carpenter, Julia Tretter, Kathie Watson-Gray, Kenneth Knowles, Kira Cotter, Kristine Lang, Kyle Raney, Llew P Williams, Laura Alvarado, Laura De Vito, Laura Provonsha, Lily George, Nelly Darmi, Nigel Rogers, Rachel Miller, Tim Scott, Tyler Kunz, Victoria Steed, Yanina Wood.
🎧 Producers
AJ Knight, Bobby Simon, Da Kovac, Eleanor Collins, Emily Griffiths, Hannah Hughes, Jennifer Kemp, Jonas Fløde, Kate F, Katie N Benitez, Kendra Murphy, Lisa Dennys, Logan Wall, Louise Lomas, Melissa Nance, Nicola Owen, Rebecka Johansson, Sam Morris, Sarah Hannah Morris.
Thank you for inviting me into this space to share my story. It is an honor. 💚