How Mike Spent Five Lost Years Before Realising He’s Autistic
In this episode, Angela speaks with Mike Matthews, a late-identified Autistic parent and writer, about the misdiagnoses, medication chaos, and sensory overload that masked the truth for half a decade.
In this meeting of The Late Diagnosis Club, Dr Angela Kingdon welcomes Mike Matthews — a late-diagnosed Autistic dad, writer, music obsessive, and dry-witted survivor of misdiagnosis, medical gaslighting, and five years of unanswered burnout.
Mike’s story will be familiar to many in our community: antidepressants that didn’t help (and sometimes made things worse), therapists who overlooked every sensory clue, a formal evaluation that arrived at the wrong diagnosis entirely, and the eventual relief of finally meeting a provider who actually understood neurodivergence.
Together, Angela and Mike explore the messy middle between “something is wrong” and “oh — it’s autism,” the years lost to misunderstanding, the grief and relief of late self-discovery, and the unexpected joy of building a life that actually fits.
🎧 Listen to this episode:
🪑 Attendees
Chair: Dr Angela Kingdon — Author, community-builder, and Autistic advocate
Guest: Mike Matthews — Autistic dad, writer, punk enthusiast & playlist archivist
You: The Listener!
🗒️ Meeting Agenda
Opening remarks from the Chair
Member introduction: Mike’s misdiagnosis journey
Discussion: Burnout, sensory life, stigma & spirals
Member spotlight: Autistic creativity, playlists & book writing
Key learnings
Club announcements
🧾 Minutes from the Meeting
1️⃣ Opening Remarks
Angela welcomes listeners into a story many late-diagnosed adults know too well: years of searching for answers, a system that keeps missing us, and the emotional cost of untreated Autistic burnout disguised as “depression.” Mike’s path began after becoming a parent — when suddenly the time he used for emotional regulation (via special interests) evaporated, and everything fell apart.
2️⃣ Member Introduction: Mike’s story
From the very first doctor visit (“eat more meat for breakfast”), Mike’s concerns were waved away, misread, or treated with trial-and-error medications that created new problems rather than solving the old ones.
3️⃣ Discussion Highlights
Five years of misdiagnosis: burnout mistaken for depression, sensory issues overlooked, and a formal evaluation that labelled him with the wrong disorder.
Medication mishaps: antidepressants causing side effects, withdrawal “brain zaps,” and treatments that obscured the real issue — autistic burnout.
Invisible sensory overwhelm: ordinary sounds, speech, and interruptions could end his entire day, a sign missed entirely by providers.
Rejection sensitivity & spiralling: email mistakes turning into hours-long shame spirals, even after diagnosis — but now with tools to self-soothe.
Grief and relief: mourning the lost years while embracing clarity, self-knowledge, and a gentler relationship with himself and others.
4️⃣ Key Learnings
Autistic burnout is not depression — and treating it as such can prolong suffering.
Misdiagnosis is common, especially when sensory experiences are ignored.
Self-knowledge changes everything: once you understand your brain, decades of confusion snap into place.
You don’t need to hide: unmasking with family, coworkers, and friends opened doors to real connection.
Neurodivergent-friendly providers save years of pain and wrong turns.
📌 Notice Board
What Does Your Face Mean?: An Informational Memoir on Late-Diagnosed Autism by Michael Matthews - Coming out next week
📣 Club Announcements
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💬 Join our online meetups and community at latediagnosis.club.
📌 Check the LDC Notice Board for Member Contributions
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We’re always looking for late-diagnosed or self-identified neurodivergent adults who are ready to share their story on The Late Diagnosis Club.
Tell us a little about yourself and your diagnosis journey here:
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🎙️ Executive Producers
Amy Burns, Anamaria B Call, Andrew Banner, Anna Goodson, Ashley Apelzin, Audrea Volker, Ben Coulson, Brian Churcek, Cappy Hamper, Carley Biblin, Charlene Deva, Chloe Cross, Clay Duhigg, Clayton Oliver, Danny Dunn, Daria Brown, David Garrido, Emily Burgess, Eric Crane, Erik Stenerud, Fiona Baker, Grace Norman, Helen Shaddock, Jaimie Collins, Jason Killian, Jen Unruh, Jennifer Carpenter, Julia Tretter, Kathie Watson-Gray, Kenneth Knowles, Kira Cotter, Kristine Lang, Kyle Raney, Llew P Williams, Laura Alvarado, Laura De Vito, Laura Provonsha, Lily George, Nelly Darmi, Nigel Rogers, Rachel Miller, Tim Scott, Tyler Kunz, Victoria Steed, Yanina Wood.
🎧 Producers
AJ Knight, Bobby Simon, Da Kovac, Eleanor Collins, Emily Griffiths, Hannah Hughes, Jennifer Kemp, Jonas Fløde, Kate F, Katie N Benitez, Kendra Murphy, Lisa Dennys, Logan Wall, Louise Lomas, Melissa Nance, Nicola Owen, Rebecka Johansson, Sam Morris, Sarah Hannah Morris.